[ Post a Response | Angel On My Shoulder ]
Posted by Judith on 11/18/2007, 7:58 am, in reply to "Re: Very Lonely"
Connie,
I know that it is hard to get out of the house. But its very important that you have something you go to at least once a week. You do need to start 'living' again. Your children had zest for living and doing things. They see you from Heaven, and they would want you to start to 'feel' again.
I wrote a poem for you, I don't know if you read it. But I am hoping it might help you start to let your emotions flow. Maybe looking through their pictures and picking out nice ones, putting them in a collage or scrap booking, might help to get your tears to flow. There is healing in tears.
It sounds like you've become very isolated, and maybe it might be time to call upon a very good friend to see if he/she might be able to join you for a lunch at least once a week.
Church groups are good for getting people together, if you are ready for church groups, that is. God is always with us, but we always get angry at Him when there are things we cannot possibly understand. He carries our anger on His shoulders for us, and sends us His Healing Grace when we are ready. But, it takes alot of time to accept this when you are grieving.
For the first year, I put together alot of photos of my dear sweet husband, and wrote letters to my beloved, and letters to God, and poetry that would make me cry, and make me angry, but I allowed myself to fall apart.
I still fall apart even now, and its hard when I have a 'bad' day. But they do pass by.
Some have journalled, others have created beautiful link sites, others have done 'volunteer services' in memory of their loved ones. You need to dig deep into your heart, and as much as it hurts, find something that can make you passionate again for 'living' using the beautiful memories of your children.
I am here to listen, and again, I open my arms and hold you tight for you to cry on my shoulder.
Lovingly,
Judith
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