[ Post a Response | Angel On My Shoulder ]
Posted by Tracy on 5/7/2008, 3:08 pm, in reply to "feels of guilt for loving someone else after losing a spouse"
I've not posted here in quite a while, but I still pop on to read. I lost my husband David in July 2003. I never thought I would recover from the hurt. I met a wonderful friend in 2004. He and I became the best of friends. I was able to tell him anything and everything about David and as often as I wanted or needed to. In January of this year, my friend and I were married. He never met my first husband, but knows all about him. I still have pictures of David, myself, and the kids in the house. And he knows I will always love David. He is not insecure about any of this and actually helped me in my healing process over the years. I have absolutely no guilt about remarrying. I learned some very important things about Heaven during my healing process that may help your friend. God tells us how wonderful Heaven is and how happy we will be in the Kingdom. He tells us while on this earth, to work on not letting our emotions rule our lives, but for us to rule our emotions. I know David is blissfully happy in Heaven because there, he is not ruled by emotions other than happiness. He is not jealous, so therefore, he would want me to be happy. If everyone in Heaven was worried about how we're doing here, how happy could they be? I'm very happy being remarried. My kids love him and he is wonderful with them. I know David is happy and happy for me. Actually, I think if David and my new husband would have met, they would have been instant friends. Your friend needs to let his spirit and heart be the guide in deciding when he has healed enough to love someone again, not society. Society tells you need to wait 1 year, 2 years, 5 years, 10 years, never...unfortunately "society" is made up of many people who have never lost a spouse.
I know I'm rambling, but I hope I helped in some way.
God Bless,
Tracy
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