[ Post a Response | Angel On My Shoulder ]
Posted by Debbie/NH on 6/9/2008, 10:56 am, in reply to "will it ever stop hurting?"
I am so sorry over the loss of your beloved Grandfather. It truly is a difficult time when the loss is so recent. It will take some time before it gets easier to manage the grief. In the last 3 years I have lost my husband, aunt and a very special close friend. I have learned that grief has no time-table and that losses are all dealt with differently.
I too never had the chance to say good-bye and I love you to my husband and that also hurt me for a very long time but I have come to realize that he knows how I feel about him and so doesn't your grandfather. You were there with him so he knows that you loved him. Not saying goodbye isn't a chance we all get. Out of my three losses I only had the opportunity to say it to my aunt and to acknowledge how grateful I was for all the things she had done for me throughout my life. But my husband and friend Darlene I did not have that chance at all.
What I did was sit down and write a journal to them of things I wished I had said then I put it next to my pillow and asked them to come read it when I was asleep. I still keep my grief journal up to date although I don't write everyday now but I did in the beginning. The pain will go away I am reassuring you just as Judith, Terrie and I have been through it your pain will subside but your love and memories will be there always.
It's many years since I lost my grandparents but I remember them so much all the time with lots of love. I remember how much they loved me too. Now it's your turn to pass on the things your grandfather taught you about love and all to someone else.. maybe not today but in time you will find a friend or someone who needs your help to get through a loss and you can assure them the pain will stop but the loss and love is something you will always have.
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