[ Post a Response | Angel On My Shoulder ]
Posted by Merlyn
on 11/30/2008, 3:11 am
I know that there is horrible things that you wonderful people are going through and i am sorry 'cause so am i.
I am tired, i have lost almost everything i ever loved.Physically My greandpa, grandma, father, sister,friend,cousin, my other grandapa, etc..
and all the people that still lives, give me their backs, they gave me their back when my sibblings and i were suffering and starving...
everytime someone saw me with a guy friend, automaticly they though that i was being a you know what... i lost my family, home and country... my self steem and soul.
I almost lost my life several times by accidents and I tried to kill mysef twice, didnt work. i cut myself to release my pain but that didnt work neither, cuz i just bleed and the pain was still there but this time stronger.
now that i only have my baby brother, mom and sister left i wont try to hurt myself anymore, but my dreams seems so far and its killing me.
i been trying to forget what happened on my life but the pain still havent stopped, and bad things keep happening.
i dont know what to do!!!!
i am going crazy out here while nobody understands.
the sad thing is that i believe on hope, and i know that one day i'll hit the big screen and when that happens i'll give my only one true family what they deserve.
but how am i am gonna make it, if i just dont believe in myself... i am alone in my thoughts while my mother has her own i am alone out there.....
i can't take this no more....i am feeling sooo weak.... tired...
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