Posted by The DOK on 1/29/2008, 9:09 am
66.60.229.108
OK, OK... *takes deep breath*... here I go:
As I've alluded to on a few pages of my website, I hate the Beach Boys. You may be saying to yourself (especially John) "well damn it all, Dok, you also said you hated the Beatles, and look where you are now!" Sure, OK, I admit my faults and I'll be happy to proclaim from the highest tops of the mountains that the Beatles are now my favorite band of all time, period. Is that out of the way now? *Ahem*, anyway...
You see, this is even more reason for me TO hate the Beach Boys. I figured that in the approach I took to the Beatles that maybe... juuuuuuuuuuuust maybe a fresh, more mature approach to the Beach Boys would 180 my feelings, due to being a tad bit older and more appreciative and curious in my musical conquests. After all, there is the endless praise of Pet Sounds, which I won't deny being the band's finest hour. The problem is, and I think this is the reason why I hate them -- their lyrics and overall sound are so damn immature in their delivery (courtesy of Brian), and I mean that in an "undeveloped" sort of way. Such a naive approach really irritates me in all the right places, since it's mostly written from the P.O.V. of a curious teenager (Pet Sounds). I've heard Smile is a much more mature and glorious album (which I would hope so, since Brian went through the entire grafting and completion process in his 60s), but I'm just too unsure to shell out the cash. I didn't even pay to hear PS, nor will I ever.
I find their melodies to be childish as well, along with the majority of the songs I've heard flat-out annoying me ("Little Deuce Coupe," "I Get Around," "409," "Help Me Ronda," "Wouldn't It Be Nice?"... and there's more!). This isn't really indicative of a band that I owe a debt of gratitude, even though they were a major catalyst in the Rock movement (for the whole entirety of a single album before Brian Wilson tucked tail and hid in his bedroom for the next decade or so, getting fat off of TV dinners, then watching his figure with a nice nose full of coke; great dieting regiment, I says!). I understand that this was one monumental mofo of an album, sure (where would Sgt. Pepper be without its genesis?), but forgive me all to hell if, for the sheer sake of the music and the music alone, I find it to be a tad bit more than disappointing. Especially when it sticks to a style like AIDS to Magic Johnson, and milks it into a bucket full of monotony for just shy of an hour. No thanks.
I will say that "Sloop John B" and "God Only Knows" are good... *gulp* great songs... but leaving an album of 13 tracks with only 2 scaling on a positive note... well, that ship just ain't gonna sail for me, cap'n. Now go ahead, flame me into the ground, then force me into one of those boxes like in Superman, forever floating through the nether regions of space as my punishment. And with that, I close out this long-winded drivel of a rant. If you made it this far, I admire your patience.
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