Posted by Jeff on 9/28/2007, 2:31 pm, in reply to "Girlfriend" Secondly, I just want to reiterate what some others have said - no one knows how long Arlene will live. While it's true that there is no cure for stage 4 cancer, there are many treatments available today that weren't available even just a few years ago. There are women at this site who have been fighting stage 4 disease for many, many years. It's a back and forth battle, but there is hope, so don't give up. Part of your job is to help her to not give up hope either. That's hard to do when it's something you can't control, and can't fix. Sometimes all you can do is be there and listen. That's ok too. She'll need that sometimes. But I think the thing that most have in common is the fear of going through this alone. Just knowing you're there for her no matter what will help her in ways you can't even imagine. Make sure to take care of yourself too. Taking care of her can be a 24/7 job, and you need to take time off for yourself or you won't be able to do it. Trust me on that, because I tried. You won't want to take a break, and you won't feel like you can, but you have to. Even if it's just for a few minutes, take some time for yourself every day. It is incredibly hard to sit by and watch someone you care about suffer, and not be able to do something about it. I've been there. Lots of us have been there. Nothing any of us can say will make that any easier. But we're here to listen if you need us.
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Hi Tom. Firstly, I applaud you for sticking by her - you'd be surprised how many guys turn and run when something like this happens. But real men don't run, they stick around and do what real men do. So thanks for sticking by her side.
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