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Jim it is natural to feel anger and frustration as part of the process of being diagnosed with breast cancer. We feel shock, disbelief and anger as we try to deal with the issues ahead. This early stage is actually one of the hardest because there is so much that is unknown. Your wife may well be experiencing these feelings too. Some time ago one of my friend's husband said to her just after diagnosis "What would you say if I just want to scream and yell at the god's THIS IS NOT FAIR THIS SHOULDN'T BE HAPPENING TO JEAN & I" her reply was "I think I would come & yell with you".And they did! However if your wife replied "I couldn't handle that" then you know it is the time to keep these feelings away from her.
You express your love for your wife beautifully in your email, does she know that's your feeling for her. I do hope so. Another of my friends (she & I were both diagnosed in Nov 2010) clearly remembers what her husband initially said to her. "There is one thing you will be totally sure of when we have beaten this breast cancer together is that I am here for you 100%, whatever support you want I will give you, whenever you want me by your side I will be with you." That has been such a blessing to her. Words can be very powerful and give courage. Lots of prayers for you both. Tricia