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Posted by Julienne on 6/1/2014, 4:00 pm
When I was ten, I got a rare condition called Pseudomembranous Colitis from taking anti-biotics. Basically, the anti biotics completely wiped all of my bodies good bacteria and so I soon after contracted C-difficile. Symptoms; severe diarrhea, bloody stools, and the medication for it made me throw up roughly every ten-fifteen minutes. After about six months the severe symptoms seemed to peter out, and both conditions are now gone, but it has been nearly a decade and I still have diarrhea at least four times a day, sometimes upwards of ten. Its awful. I cant leave the house for hours in the morning and even slight hard work makes it infinitely worse, but recently it has become more debilitating because it is impossible for me to go anywhere that isnt home. I cant go on day trips because there wont be a bathroom. Not one that I can have diarrhea in, at least. I can pretty much forget travel or sleepovers, which complicates things because im in a specialized music school that tours a lot.i dont know where the line is between parcopresis and just having this condition; needless to say, some of the worst moments in my life where in public bathrooms, Ive spent more of my life on the toilet than not. I physically can not go anywhere that is not home. How am I supposed to move in with someone? How the frig is a honeymoon going to work? I cant spend the entire time bloated and in pain and pannicing because of this stupid condition. But how do I fix it? I was doing so good; but then I was at the hospital again for an MRI and I had such a horrible reaction to the muscle relaxants that I went temporarily blind and had diarrhea worse than when I had full throttle c-dif, and spent about three hours in the hospitals lobby restroom, and another hour in a mcdonalds washroom with a bunch of people my age taking selfies. Im completely set back now. I feel that the parcopresis wont go away for me until the weird post post infectious symptoms go away. People rarely believe that I have a legitimate chronic illness becauae I only tell them about the pain and fatigue. I have not even told my partner, because really, who wants their partner to invision them having diarrhea every day? Its not like diarrhea is as horrible and gross and disgusting as it is portrayed on slap stick television and mean spirited kids shows. It just means that you dont properly absorb nutrients from food. That is all.
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