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Posted by Jack on 1/5/2006, 10:37 pm, in reply to "please help me understand" I'd agree with your friend. Best thing is to give her space. You've done everything in your power to work things out and she's read malicious intent into your every action. The balls in her court now. The fact that she keeps calling you bothers me. A few ideas I have are: (1) She's trying to see if you're still under her thumb; (2) She's trying to keep you on as a friend and move on gently; (3) She truly wants you back, but isn't sure if its gonna work: plus I'd feel like a fool if I behaved the way she did and then took it all back; (4) She's not sure what the hell she's doing and is ambivalent about the relationship. My advice to you: Call her no more than once a week, and don't talk about yourself except when she asks you to answer specific questions, since the problem seems to be that you monopolize conversations. Ask her about herself and don't interupt except to nod and acknoledge her remarks. Learn to ask appropriate questions to keep her going and let her talk as long as she'd like. When she's done, tell her it was great talking with her and that you'd like another chance but you understand if she wants to move on since you were such a jerk (I don't think you were unreasonable, but if you want her back you'll have to bow to her pride). Don't call her back whenever she calls you, but do answer the phone when you have the chance. Follow the formula above, and if it seems like her biggest issue is the roof tearing thing, ask if she'd take you back if you went to anger management. If the answer is no, there's probably not much I can advise. She might just want to see other people and be using the fight as an excuse. Did she see anyone the last time you broke up? If not I wouldn't worry about it. I'm jaded from getting burned in the past, and while your girl sounds like a psycho, I'm sure there are lots of good qualities that don't present in a post like this.
She sounds psycho to me. Is she Bipolar?
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