T'was the Night Before Christmas For Dads On the night before Christmas, I look at my watch Down at the corner, I get to bed late and, They sit on my lap They scream, "Merry Christmas!" My head is exploding! Just before Christmas dinner, On Christmas, I hug After dinner, my aunt Then all my wife's family Back in the corner, "Peace on Earth, everybody. They all go outside whooping Semper Fidelis
It's still in the house.
My whole family is sleeping,
So I'm quiet like a mouse.
And midnight is near.
I think I'll sneak out
For a cold glass of beer.
The crowd is so merry,
I end up by drinking
About twelve Tom 'n' Jerry.
Gee whiz, how I'm sleeping,
When onto my bed,
Those darn kids come leaping!
And they jump on my belly,
And I'm shivering all over
Like a bowl full of jelly.
My poor wife and me,
We stumble downstairs
And she lights up the tree.
My mouth tastes like a pickle!
I step on a skate
And fall on a tricycle!
I relax to a point,
Then relatives start swarming
All over the joint..
And I kiss my wife's mother.
The rest of the year,
We don't speak to each other.
And my wife's uncle Louie
Get into an argument;
They're both awful screwy!
Say Louie is right,
And my goofy relations,
They join in the fight.
The radio's playing,
And over the racket,
Gabriel Hader is saying,
And good will toward men."
And, just at that moment,
Someone slugs Uncle Ben.
So the neighbors will hear.
Oh, I'm so glad Merry Christmas
Comes just once a year!
Ricardo
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