Part of it is determined by life stages. We get married, and it's all about the other person. We have children, and it's about giving them a good base, healthful food, etc. We have jobs, and it's about doing the best job that we can, while still doing what we need to for our husband, children, and pets. Pregnancy, menopause, sheesh.
Which makes me wonder if we're not in the best position of all to be out best selves now, after retirement.
Most of the level-headed, helpful, wise, relaxed people that I know are post-retirement age. It seems a shame to wait to gather your calm and wisdom until after 50 or 60, but that's how it seems to be a lot of the time.
Now, you can take that wisdom, and work on being your best self.
I know that you are doing the Bible studies, so you will probably find guidance there, even though it's not new to you.
Sometimes, I think that people wait for big things. An entire change of life. But, I believe that it can be small things, too. Small changes can make a lot of difference.
I like your attitude!
Love All Life; Thank You For Posting! :)