I would stale the bread days to weeks ahead, cook the onions and celery ahead, make the cranberry sauce ahead - it's better not made the day-of anyway, etc. etc. Still, it's a lot of work when completely from scratch, with no boxed goods or cans, etc.
Let's not forget the pies, etc. A lot to do. I don't blame anyone for not wanting to do it all themselves anymore. At least my grandmother made the main dishes, potatoes, and stuffing, etc. and everyone else brought sides and desserts. Like you, I didn't have help or people bringing dishes.
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