Like many of life's challenges that require us to make choices and take actions that are basically opposite of what would give us instant gratification or pacification, it can seem impossible. But losing weight is NEVER impossible. The possibility is always there! It is our personal dialog that sets our course. We have everything we need to succeed. It's not a matter of education or poverty or genetics or access to tools or substances or resources. Over the years I have worked with people from every imaginable walk of life and no one has an actual advantage over the other because we are all limited by the same thing. Our thoughts. If you believe you can and will accomplish something, you are setting a destination in your mind's GPS. That may come with some detours and delays, but rather then stop and wait for a 10 car pile-up, you recalculate and continue on.
I had days when it was a blood and guts battle with myself. It almost felt like a physical fight with the person I had always believed myself to be, and the person I decided I was destined to be. Obesity was not my destiny as I had believed my entire life. It was the consequence of my choices and my thoughts, and like a doorway to actions, I kept walking through that same dang door!
Speaking of "doors"..I used visualization a lot while losing my weight. One of them was of me bracing against a door that was ajar. On the other side were hoards of excuses and justifications and self doubts...and sadly, self hate. My sense of unworthiness was the monster in the back of the pack, trying to bust down the door and flood me with hopelessness. I had to keep pushing to prevent all my natural tendencies from overtaking me. Those were the tough times. The raging battle.
Other times it was like a walk in a field of daisies! I was in control, felt invincible, on fire! FREE!
The emotional chaos we all run in to while attempting to make extreme changes like this is to be expected and respected. It is part of the process and hopefully will be looked back on some day with the perspective of someone that has challenged and won each battle as they came, or at the least did not let it stop us.
My ultimate goal was to finally quietly close the door on my challengers (my thoughts, urges, cravings, desire for pacification) and find a peaceful, logical, and realistic place for food in my life. I have not been 100% successful, but I would give myself a good solid 85%.
It sounds like you had some stuff going on that triggered your need for comfort or distraction and you automatically reverted to the familiar band-aid. That's probably the most common reason for people to fall off their diet. We decide in those moments to confront our demons or surrender. Most of the time, most of us surrender, and we end up with more reasons to feel hopeless.
The fact that you always get back up and brush yourself off and continue on is admirable. It is also the only way to make this work. No one is ever perfect on SS or any diet for that matter. You've had physical obstacles this past year that certainly cramped your style, but "You take a lickin' and keep on tickin'!" lol! Younger board members will not understand that reference 
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