Wow! That song is amazing! Thank you for sharing that.

I have not been on meds for a very long time. But back in 1986 when my mom died, a friend that was a licensed clinical social worker suggested I try medication to get through it. I had grown up with panic anxiety disorder, but back then they did not have a name for it. I had just kept it to myself because I didn't understand what was happening to me. It shaped my whole life, basically. when I went on the amitriptyline it was like all the windows had been flung open! all the panic and anxiety was gone, along with the depression. But like you've experienced, the side effects can be very unpleasant. I used it for about a year and then I was better able to manage my issues on my own. After I lost my weight, I was so happy and active that everything kind of changed for me. I still have things that trigger my panic/anxiety, but I manage it pretty well now.