i appreciate that you did say sorry as well to anybody who might have been offended. (in some ways, offending people is bound to happen and is not the end of the world: what's more important is that we maintain a feeling of safety on the message board.) anyway, it's water under the bridge. plus, your post brought up a couple of really important issues: boundaries for content on the board, and the sexual link of this condition (my first experience of shy bowel happened on the very first 'dirty weekend' that i spent away with my first sexual girlfriend. (...and why do we call it a 'dirty weekend'?) so thank you for that. marlon brando was fond of quoting some chappy (probably de sade) when he used to say, "it's a fine kind of pride that a woman has, being situated as it as half an inch from her anus". the kind of glib remark that brando would have loved to use no doubt (and boy did he have his issues), but it does draw our attention to that fact that our sexes and our anuses are in pretty damned close proximity. and perhaps, for some of us shy bowel sufferers, becoming more integrated with our own sexual desires and feelings, less uptight about our asses, our assholes, and our rectums, may be a fundamental part of our recoveries. mathman talked about the idea of using butt plugs as a way of practicing defecation. i would go one step further and suggest, "why not start using anal sextoys (such as buttplugs or thai lovebeads) to get to know your butt?"; start enjoying the sexual sensations of the anus (it's one of the most highly concentrated areas of nerve endings in the entire universe!) if we start associating pleasure with our anuses and rectums instead of dread and fear then i'm guessing it's gonna help the old shy bowel somewhere along the line. well, shy pooper - now i've probably gone and offended a couple of people... but i have tried not to make anyone feel unsafe or inhibited from using this message board. thank you for your appreciation of the site; i'm glad that you find it useful. you say you are a true sufferer of this condition and i believe you are. btw, you mentioned in some of your posts about the need to be discreet overcoming your need to go (until you get home). do you still feel that you can't talk about this condition (or pooping and farting generally) with any of your friends or girlfriend etc? what do you think is at the root of your need to be so discreet about something so natural as pooping?
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