hi Baz,

thanks for your extensive reply. :-) no it wasn't actually jest as this was really the first thing that came into my mind.
you're spot on in everything you wrote i think, you summarized the problem brillantly. :-)
yes it's because i am (we are) so aware of BMs and all related matters that we automatically assume everyone else is too. which is nonsense of course.

i liked your idea of taking a sudoku into the toilet. actually i have done this before ;-), only when i was on my own though and to pass the time when you know you're gonna be in there for quite a while.

i do like the sound of your third option. though i'm not sure whether this would help me 'go' at least this attitude would be rather healthy to have anyway.

thanks for your encouragement, i really did find it very helpful.

Emily