[ Post a Response | Message Board ]
Re: It's running my life:(
hello jane, i think ocd is part of it, for me too. feeling hated for it, for the poo, i know that too. finding this site, years ago, inspired me to begin to tell close friends what my difficulty was. i was so touched by their reactions, nothing like the horror i imagined. and it was empowering somehow, and i even managed to laugh at myself a bit, cos i found some people liked to make a joke, and i would get tearful, misunderstanding their intention. i dont care so much what people think of me anymore, well, much less so. im very sensitive to it though. can cry so easily. with experience i begin to know who i want in my life, and don't waste too much time worrying about people i don't. the most caring person i told was a festival goer. and festivals were something i really really wanted to go to. i managed it (thats a whole story), it was peculiar, embarrasing, but i had a good attitude, and it worked fine (i worked out how to poo). and i had the best times ever. my regards and best wishes to you. do whatever you feel like doing. noone is going to hate you, and if they do, so what?! the really important thing is you learn to feel comfortable with who you are, and dont hate yourself anymore. i highly recommend reading anything by Pema Chodron for that. eg 'start where you are'. total support for you there. best wishes to you.