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    Mr T, Nancy Reagan, and Dana Plato 📂 Archived Message

    Posted by Morrissey on November 26, 2021, 8:19 pm

    Mr. T
    aka Lawrence Tureaud
    "I am the best bodyguard because I'll take a bullet, I'll take a stab wound, I'll take a hit upside the head; I'm like a Kamikaze pilot. The President got shot because his men relaxed." --Mr. T, September 1983 Playboy interview
    Born Laurence Tureaud, then Tero, then T.
    Former bodyguard of Michael Jackson, Muhammad Ali, Leon Spinks, Steve McQueen, LeVar Burton, Diana Ross, and others.
    Winner of the World's Toughest Bouncer contest. One of the events in the competition was dwarf tossing, since outlawed.
    One of the three living members of the A Team .
    Nancy Reagan sat on his lap in an awkward photo-op.
    On the Stonecutter High Council.
    Modeled his hair in Mandinka style, after he saw it in a National Geographic photograph.
    A wide array of Mr. T merchandise exists, including but not limited to air fresheners, chewing gum, and a Mr. T ice.
    -----------------------
    Nancy Reagan
    Born Anne Frances Robbins, renamed to Nancy Davis by a studio.
    Wife of President Ronald Reagan. Ronald knocked her up before they got married. He called her Mommy. After he got Alzheimer's, she became his caretaker.
    The last movie she appeared in was Hellcats of the Navy which she starred in with Ronald.
    Hired astrologer Joan Quigley, who had an alarming say in when the President would travel or meet with foreign leaders.
    Just Say No anti-drug campaign, which failed so miserably that drug use actually increased during her reign.
    Guest-starred in an episode of Different Strokes with Dana Plato (now dead from an overdose) and the rest. Thus it may not have been the best choice of show for a lasting anti-drug message.
    Undertook an expensive redecoration of the White House, in the midst of a major economic recession.
    Had a mastectomy .
    "A woman is like a teabag -- you can't tell how strong she is until you put her in hot water."
    If you received a gift from the Reagans, it was probably an unwanted, retread gift that someone had already given them. This is Nancy's doing, not Ronald's.
    Black people were not permitted in her parents' home.

    Timeline

    12 Dec 1983
    Nancy Reagan sits in Mr. T 's lap, the only First Lady to have done so.

    2 Mar 1987
    "I don't think most people associate me with leeches or how to get them off. But I know how to get them off. I'm an expert at it." Spoken about Donald Regan.

    5 Jun 2004
    With his family by his side, former U.S. President Ronald Reagan dies from Alzheimer's disease and pneumonia complications at his home in Los Angeles , CA. Newly-widowed Nancy Reagan observes: "Ronnie's long journey has finally taken him to a distant place where I can no longer reach him."

    Dana Plato
    Dana Michelle Plato (1964-1999) endured a roller coaster life of career sabotage, drug addiction, pornography, armed robbery, and Gary Coleman . Placed up for adoption by a sixteen year-old, baby Dana was taken in by an overachieving southern California mother who gently guided her as best she could toward an acting career. Starting at the age of seven, Dana was regularly thrust before the camera, appearing in over one hundred ads for Kentucky Fried Chicken, Noxema, Arco, Hallmark and other high-profile sponsors. During numerous retakes of one commercial for Dole fruit cocktail, Plato ended up extremely ill after consuming eighty-two bananas which expanded in her stomach.

    Shortly thereafter, she was enthusiastically hired for the lead role in The Exorcist, but her adoptive mother refused to allow Dana's participation in "that kind of movie". As Linda Blair enjoyed overnight superstardom, Dana plodded through roles in Beyond the Bermuda Triangle.

    During a brief appearance on The Gong Show , Dana was spotted by a producer who helped her land the role of Kimberly Drummond, the older sister on TV's Diff'rent Strokes. Her character served a dual purpose: she'd cast disapproving glances at the crazy schemes of her younger brothers, and she'd periodically proclaim she was no longer using the bathroom.

    Regardless, this part earned the child star tremendous fame and the unprecedented salary of $22,000 per episode

    ---from the late great site Rotten.com

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