"After much soul-searching I, Stephen Colbert, am banning Kanye West from the Ed Sullivan Theatre."
Posted by Morrissey on December 1, 2022, 10:29 pm
STEPHEN COLBERT: Welcome to the Late Show. I'm your host, Stephen Colbert.
AUDIENCE: Hurrah!
STEPHEN COLBERT: A lot of big stories to talk about tonight but first I have a big announcement to make. After much thought and soul searching soul-searching I, Stephen Colbert, am banning Kanye West from the Ed Sullivan Theatre.
AUDIENCE: Hooray! Yay!
STEPHEN COLBERT: Have to! I have to!
AUDIENCE: Hooray! [cheering continues for extended time]
STEPHEN COLBERT: Line in the sand! In fact, as host of the Late Show my jurisdiction extends into the northern half of Times Square---
AUDIENCE: Ha ha ha ha ha!
STEPHEN COLBERT: and I am banning Kanye from coming north of Bubba Gum Shrimp
AUDIENCE: Ha ha ha ha! Hooray!
STEPHEN COLBERT: Okay, I HAVE to! Have to!
[Guitarist plays a light jazzy lick to enhance the mood]
STEPHEN COLBERT: Stay outa Times Square! He's been creepin' out the Elmos, and they've seen a LOT, already!
AUDIENCE: Ha ha ha ha ha!
STEPHEN COLBERT: And ---I just wanna take a moment here and just point out that this next part is the courageous part--- I'm also ending all of our high profile collabs, including but not restricted to our collection of spreadable jams....
ad nauseam...
Although I will still welcome good people, such as the Clinton family, the Obamas, Bill
O'Reilly, Bill Maher, General Michael Hayden (thank you for your service, sir!), Condoleezza Rice (our first woman Secretary of State!), Anthony Blinken (an outstanding public servant in the tradition of Condoleezza Rice!), and a host of other moral champions, all of whom I am sure will endorse my banning of that disgusting black man.
Can we please have a concise version upfront first . Like one sentence guide perhaps. Just to get the spec, so to speak, before plunging in? Avoiding cans of worms and all that : )?
Okay, here's the elevator pitch...
Posted by Morrissey on December 2, 2022, 4:29 am, in reply to "You are on the roll M"
House jester takes time off tongue-bathing war criminals and pretending the likes of Bill O'Reilly and Chelsea Clinton are serious, in order to deliver a stern homily against a black entertainer, lacing his message with sub-Taika Waititi cracks* and tinkling piano chords.
* A very, very low bar indeed, as anyone who has suffered through Thor: Ragnarok or Jojo Rabbit will be only too aware.
I think one needs to cut him some slack here, after all he's just a host on a talk show. Personally, I think Colbert's stance and actions are rather courageous, for a person in his position; which is that of slimy human suppository firmly rammed up the stinking anus of the ruling class!
Colbert is nauseating. He went from the comedy firmament with "The Colbert Report" to utter sell-out establishment fluffer. John Stewart's recent soft-balling of the two war criminals Killary and oil tanker woman (not to mention his awarding medals to Azovs) is another bad sign that he's going the same way.
Colbert has long gone though. I think you can just once in a while see it on his face though; just that brief flicker of "What have I become?" and then it's gone....no amount of cajolery, and no attempts at ethical or social seduction, can eradicate from my heart a deep burning hatred for the Tory Party...So far as I am concerned they are lower than vermin.
Letterman was funnier and quicker of thought than Colbert, but just as much a tool.
is that the hypocrisy of him being banned/cancelled, etc. for saying he likes Hitler while the government is shovelling money and weapons to people whose regimental insignia are facist and have swastika tattoos and talk about purifying the race and all the rest of it.
Extended coverage could get quite uncomfortable for them hopefully. ...no amount of cajolery, and no attempts at ethical or social seduction, can eradicate from my heart a deep burning hatred for the Tory Party...So far as I am concerned they are lower than vermin.