Idk schlepp. I cant imagine prostate surgery being any easier. My pops had his " shaved" and his ende of days were then spent having to catheter inorder to piss. Pops was pretty dam miserable going through that.... And kal went through prostate cancer/ surgery. Turned him into a different person. Mostly ruined his life.

I try to stick with the belief. We are given the crosses we are able to bare.

I awoke about an hour ago. It seems the boils are multiplying. It isnt fun. But, soaking in a tub with the witch hazel, alternating with hot compresses. It is somewhat of a mitigating process. Eazes the pain & swelling. And eventually i hope the antibiotics i started yesterday rnd the sub-q infection. There was nothing i could do to ease my pops suffering with the swollen prostate and full bladder. The frustration he went through trying to self catheter. Ya have to lube the catheter, and that makes your fingers slick and then the penis/ utethera keep slipping out of grasp. Id try to do it for him which he found humiliating.

And yet, theres worse things than all of these such as severe burns. And others we havent thought of.

Probably the hidden saving grace in what im experiencing. I sleep most of every day now.

Ive chosen this path. My son offered me to live with he & his wife. And im sure i could check into a nursing facility. Carmelita bailed a few months back. I didnt expect her to stay for this stage. Just wlvis & I and the neighbors dogs that comes over and visits us nearly daily. Dogs get it. Most humans dont. End of days? Mostly we want calm & quiet. Arguing and anger, pity & sadness are the least emotions we want around us. The neighbors aussie shepherd comes. Barks for me to open the gate. Follows me into the house and lays down on my feet for an hour or 2. Elvis comes over lays next to him. And then jake gets up & goes to the doo after hes paid his respects. Its soul soothing ✌️. Jakes owner patty sez she doesnt understand it. Jake bites or growls at most strangers except me. I keep telling her, dogs can smell & feel our intentions. Critters have always liked me. I dont have a mean bone unless provoked. Even then ive slways attempted peaceful tesolution 1st. Years ago, yeah, jake tried "mean dog" with me. After a few encounters he realized i was gentle.