re straining: in my own experience, it works up to a point (to tell the colon and the anal sphincter that you want to go), but if the colon and anal sphincter don't want to play ball, then it's best just to leave it, otherwise you are effectively giving yourself haemeroids.

i've certainly had that horrible feeling of only getting a bit out and feeling bruised and unrelieved as well. horrible!! (the colon and anal sphincter not quite feeling relaxed enough).

out of interest saz, do you find it's worse in the winter? (just wondering if there's a connection between feeling winter blues and this condition... i've started taking vitamin D supplement pills to give me more of a 'sunny' mood during these low sunlight months).

your theory on how it started with you sounds very plausible and possible. i wonder why you were constipated as a child? do you remember anything that triggered it? (fear of the toilet room? emotional stuff going on in the family?)

glad to hear you're looking forward to the spring meeting - i think it could be really useful for all of us. phobia conditions do tend to get worse over time unless you start addressing them.

best,
baz