First, you need to get over the shame of the issue. Clearly you are not the only one. remind yourself that it's an adaptive quality for the body to be tense and alert when one senses danger. Unfortunately, this is a maladaptive, irrational consequence for some of us. I don't hide my problem from friends anymore; I joke about it. I've got bigger balls than my friends in many ways, so I don't let it get me down. Maybe they can shit for an audience and I have to be totally alone; maybe they can take a piss at a urinal next to other guys while I can't, but I'm also less afraid of a fight than they are, I can handle more pain, and I'm just generally tougher. So am I a pussy because I have to be alone to shit? No. It's out of my control, I have to deal with it. Sucks but there it is. So laugh it off, man, it doesn't define you, it's some shit you gotta deal with is all