You've been working for years. You can explore other employment possibilities at this point.

Here's a care assistant job on Gumtree. £9/hour. Full time and part time available. I guarantee that this job is real and that they hire absolutely anyone.

Pumpkin Cafe is looking for part time staff for £6.70/hour.

There's a Nando's opening next month. They're looking for hosts, grillers, and cashiers. You can be a griller or a cashier. Maybe a host isn't your thing. Probably minimum wage, as I assume Pumpkin Cafe is.

Papa Johns is looking for both moped and car delivery drivers. Oh, and just in-store workers.

There's a cleaning job for some office. £6.70.

That's about it for jobs in the last 30 days. I didn't mention the scam work at home jobs or anything that required licences or whatnot.

So yeah, nothing great but why limit yourself to Darlington? There's a big world out there. You must have money saved up. You don't even need much. I came to London with £1500 and a dream. Others come with much less money. And I travelled 5000 miles to get there.

It's a two and a half hour train journey from Darlington. You could still visit on weekends. How much are tickets? £123. That's not cheap but you'd be making London money.

Are there jobs in London? Yeah. New models required and packers wanted for £13.75/hour. But those are the joke ad jobs.

Confident women 18-30 wanted.

But no, there's loads of real jobs here. Kitchen porter, painting and decorating. Here's a courier job looking for people who own their own motorcycles. That would be good for you. Don't have to talk to anyone and just ride your bike all day. Can pretend that you're in the Hell's Angels.

That's just from the first page of jobs posted in the last hour.

Let me look for data entry jobs. Live-in charity fundraiser? That's weird. Free accomodation. Sounds like the sort of job where they first ask for pictures of you in swimwear.

Data analyst for a local council. Looks temporary. Can't be that advanced because they're only paying £8/hour. That's the minimum.

Couple of legit office admin jobs. £20,000/year.

Here's an older job listing but it's straight data entry for a Heathrow cargo company and it's £9-10/hour.

So there's work out there that doesn't involve working for the modern equivelent of the Royal African Company.