There was a marathon so I had to turn around. What a great idea this is. Block major streets for hours so that some middle class ####s can run while saying "woo hoo!" every ten seconds. Couldn't you do this on your own time whenever you like? Why block the streets with this?

Or why not have marathons out in the sticks? Why have it in the city centre blocking major roads?

So I had to turn around and since there's no grocery stores south of the river, I stopped in a kebab shop. The shutters were down and nobody was inside but it said "yes, we're open" on the door. I get in and the menu is all boarded up and they took down the posters that used to be on the wall. So I said, "Are you open?" to some confused-looking old man but he didn't speak English. There's a lot of food behind the counter, though. So I just place my order. "Can I have a lamb donner and chips, please?". He looks at me like I was insane. I repeated my order. He turns around to somebody in the kitchen and asks if they serve lamb donners and chips. The kitchen confirms it.

So I wait about 15 minutes for this thing. Two other customers came in during this wait so they were open. But why were the shutters down? Why was the menu boarded up? Why were the posters down? They still had a Pakistani news channel on their two tv's, though. There was also a white guy who came in once in a while. I think he was the delivery driver. A brown woman with big tits came out from behind the curtain once and smiled at me.

Totally bizarre. I've been there three or four times before. Anyway, this lamb donner and chips was alright and only cost £3.50 so that's tough to beat.

Let's see Tinder. I finally messaged one of the women who I matched like a week earlier. I asked if India was her real name. She said, "It's my Saturday name". I don't know what that means and I don't care. I won't be messaging her again. B-O-R-I-N-G!

Also matched with a woman with a Jewish name. Her profile just says, "I'm new here help me" and has random emoticons.

Well, Keziah, here's the breakdown:

1. Ignore 95% of the men.

2. Message the sexiest, most muscular man you can find even though you yourself are no more than a 6 out of 10 in the looks department.

3. Have sex with hunky man.

4. Hunky man never contacts you again.

5. Complain about how all men are shit and only looking for sex.

6. Go back to step 1.

Going to play some Crusader Kings 2, I guess. All I have left to do today is shave my head. Already got my food and did my transcript work.