That's all fine and good but it sort of illustrates how little there is to see in the UK. Pubs and parks and statues.

I've travelled fairly extensively through Scotland and there's the same shit. I've been through Tripadvisor's top 20 things to do in Scotland with my lady friend. We've seen all them. Museums, parks, castles, cathedrals. It's a bit disappointing. This is the best you have?

I was trying to sell my lady friend on the bridges of Glasgow. "People come from all over to see the bridges." "Really?" She couldn't believe it. But it's true. There's loads of bridges in Glasgow, some interesting modern ones, and I see people taking pictures of them all the time. She couldn't appreciate the beauty of the craftsmanship and the high level of engineering involved in some of these old bridges.

But you are sort of reduced to this in the UK. You have to really want to appreciate stuff. You can't go in with a closed mind because nothing here will dazzle you.

Contrast this to all the amazing shit on offer in the US. You go to the Grand Canyon or something. You're bound to be impressed. No effort required. Niagra Falls. Actually, let's look on Tripadvisor for the top things to do in the US.

I have to be honest. These are not impressive. The National 9/11 Memorial & Museum is the number 2 thing to see in America? Give me a fucking break. And Central Park is number 1? Absolutely no way.

I mean, I've been to Hyde Park in London. I dare say it's at least as nice as Central Park. All it is is a big park. It's not the best thing to do in the UK.

Number five is The Wizarding World of Harry Potter in Florida. It's just ridiculous. I never even heard of that. Where is Disney World on this list? You're telling me that The Wizarding World of Harry Potter is better than Disney World?

There's a bunch of museums. The Art Institute in Chicago is the number 1 thing to do in Chicago, apparently. I've been there at least once but don't really remember it. I would have said...number one is...oh, I don't know...the Sears Tower (called the Willis Tower now, I think). Only the world's tallest building up until about 1995. Or...I don't know...see a baseball game in historic Wrigley Field. That would be a great tourist thing.

Pink Jeep Tours Sedona. I mean really. If you're doing that, you're gay. I don't even know where Sedona is. Arizona. I mean really. That made the top 20?

I got sidetracked but I don't know. Maybe there's not really much to see any where.