I traveled back in time to the Holy Roman Empire. There was a war going on with France and England. I spoke to the armourer, some old guy, and he said, "Oh, you must be the new recruit". I said, "I guess so." So he gave me a suit of armour and a mace and he said that this is the last suit of armour that they have. Everybody is dying. The French and English are breaching the walls of our city.

I start putting the armour on, it came in several pieces. I think it was sort of chain mail. Then he gives me a pouch. I say, "What's this for?" He says, "That's your pay. There's gold inside." Sure enough, there were a few gold coins.

So I took my wallet out and said that I would give him my wallet for being so kind to me. I thought that he would be amazed by the craftsmanship of the wallet. Surely, wallets of the Middle Ages weren't as well crafted as post-modern wallets.

But he wasn't actually that impressed by it. What impressed him was the money. I had a few American dollars but they were kind of in the style of UK currency. But one of them definitely had George Washington on it and another had Abraham Lincoln.

So I start telling him about Washington's wig. He was impressed with that. I'm telling him that that's what people would wear 600 years in the future.

But then I get to the $5 note with Lincoln on it. And I tell him that he freed the slaves. This old couldn't believe it. "You mean all of them?" I said yeah. All over the country. The guy asked how an economy can exist without slave labour. I just told him that it happened.

I start welling up with patriotic tears. So even though the war is pointless, even if we win the battle, the war is just going to continue, we can't possibly defeat both France and England, I go out there with my mace and armour.

I'm on the battlefield. There's a fort on one side and a fort on the other. I'm in our fort. I see archers shooting and getting shot at. I see catapults. I see melee guys. Everybody is getting killed. I'm just watching this from behind a watchtower. Our walls get breached. I think that it's over.

But then their walls get breached by a catapult shot. So there's a big change in the momementum of the battle. I get enboldened and run out. By the time I get to the battlefield, there's just one enemy left. Everybody else fled or has been killed. I make it my mission to kill this last guy. I'll be a hero if I kill the last guy. So we're all chasing him but I get to him first and bash him with my mace, killing him.

We all go back to camp and sure enough, I'm a hero. I'm a big time-traveling hero. People fear and respect me. Everyone's talking about me.

Things are going good for a while but then I go to get some ale. The waitresses makes some disparaging comment to me. So I say, "Oh, really?" The whole tavern is watching this. I can't beat her up. Beating a womman is a breach of etiquite in feudal times. So instead, I take a piece of paper (parchment, I guess), spit on it, get some mucus in there, and rub it in her face. The tavern erupts with cheers. Then I take my mace, rip some different paper that she was holding out of her hands, and walk away.

As I'm exploring the different parts of this base camp, I keep adjusting how the lighting should be. Everything is too bright in the dream. I have to keep reminding myself that this is feudal times. They didn't have electric lighting. They had candles. It was dark. So as I'm going room to room and remembering this, the rooms get darker. But I keep forgetting so when I go the next room, it's again too bright, and I repeat the process.