- Alisa. A 22 year old Chinese woman. She actually initiated the conversation with "hi". Then she replied once more with a decent reply. And then she replied with a short reply. Then she stopped replying. This all happened over the course of one day.
I must have been her first match and then she found out that women on Tinder get 100 matches a day so she found about 100 sexier guys that she could be talking to. I don't expect a 22 year old good looking woman to talk to me anyway. I assumed she was a prostitute at first but I'm not sure that she is.
- Bella. 28 year old black woman who I think lives in Edinburgh. She has two really bad pictures that she obviously took herself and they look almost identical. They look okay but maybe she's obese.
You can choose a favourite song on Tinder. Hers is Night Ride Across the Caucasus. Maybe some sort of racial thing.
I haven't messaged her yet. Edinburgh is so far away. Although, I did message that Chinese woman and she's a bit further away.
- Kirstin. 31. I got this match while I was in Perth. She lives in some little village near there.
Pan and poly. If you don't know what that means or don't approve, swipe left.
Things I like:
Politics
Photography
Music
Comedy
Cats
Kink/BDSM
Witty first messages
Football
Tall guys
Petite girls
Irish accents
Things I dislike:
Coffee
Tea
Smoking
Cricket
Tories
One-line, hi how are you first messages
Vanilla sex
Arrogance
Snapchat filters
Blank profiles
Poor grammar/spelling
Then there are her pictures. She's showing about a foot of lingerie in a couple of these. And she looks...you know how I used to call British people "inbreds"? This is what I had in mind.
And yet, this woman, who presumably doesn't have a job, who looks...manish, who's probably overweight, thinks that she can get TWO guys at the same time. It's madness.
The only reason I haven't unmatched her is in the vain hope that when she says "poly" she means another woman and a guy. But imagine what that other woman must look like to agree to this. I don't think she'll be "petite".
I also had some terrifying matches on Bumble who I immediately unmatched. And there was a decent-loooking African woman who messaged me but upon closer inspection she had children. So that was an unmatch.
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