Your post is not to long. You give me a good view at your problem. It is quiet similar to what I feel. Bye,
As I wrote before it was a relief to me that other persons also have some kind of fear about defecating with public in the neighborhood. For everyone it is a private situation, were you want to have a relaxed feeling.
It is quiet normal to go to the toilet in a place of your own. Have you ever heard about holiday-constipation? A lot of people are suffering from that problem. My girlfriend and I were a few years ago on holiday on the Dutch isle Texel, very well known to German people. She was really full of shit. She likes to do it (and pissing also) in the open nature, if possible. We were walking in a silent wood, were she tried to pooh behind several trees, but without any result. A few hours later we were at home and she said, when she opened the front door: 'Now it comes, I'm gonna make miles of shit.' Which she really did.
The problem is that you and I make a bigger problem of it than 'normal' people do.
Telling about your practopresis is the most safe if you are selective. There must me people around you who will understand you and who do not laugh about it. How does your boyfriend think about it? If he really loves you, he will try to understand you. And that is the same with other people which you have a good relationship. Don't be shy. Start carefully with selected people and then go on with other ones.
Your post is not to long. You give me a good view at your problem. It is quiet similar to what I feel.