Feels like a Sunday. THAT'S BECAUSE IT WAS A SCOTTISH BANK HOLIDAY! I wonder if there are any English ones that we don't get in Scotland or if it's just a straight up improvement: an extra bank holiday for Scotland.

You look at the whole independance situation. Scotland is two small, impoverished cities; a handful of inbred villages; farmland; a nature reserve; and half the country is uninhabited mountain wasteland. How can you get a successful country out of this?

On the other hand, things would certainly be more progressive. Of course, there's already more progressive policies in Scotland than in the rest of the UK and that's what causes so much bitterness by non-Scottish British people. It stands to reason that this progressiveness would be expanded were it not held back by conservative politicians from the rest of the UK.

It's similar to what one finds in the US. The US would be a much more progressive place were it not for the South. This has been the case at least since the Reconstruction. For the unitiated, that's the period starting in 1867 after the Civil War where the North tried (and failed) to implement more progressive policies in the South.

It continues today. Were it not for the conservative Southern politicians, Congress would be able to enact a more progressive agenda. And this is by no means a new situation, as I've stated.

I feel like I have to take a lot of dumps of late. Just took a pretty good one today. I think I took a good one a couple days ago too. But now I feel like I could go again.

Oh, and I tried that expensive M&S toilet paper. No semi-pun intended, it's shit. Well, I mean, it works. It doesn't fall apart in your hand or anything. It removes faecal matter. But it's not luxurious. My anus isn't getting pampered by this stuff. I don't feel good leaving the bathroom. It's just utilitarian paper. Not harsh, not decadent, just normal stuff. How is it £3.00 for four rolls? Next time, the cocoa butter stuff.

Oh, it's actually shea butter. I know it's not cocoa butter but that's just what I always called it because I didn't know the actual name. But I looked it up.

And yeah, £4.50 for 9 rolls at Sainsburys. Well...that's not comparing like for like, is it? You usually get a hefty discount for buying toilet paper in bulk to compensate for the embarassment of walking out of the store with a mountain of toilet paper. Well, here's an import shop selling four rolls for £4.00. But that's an import shop. They always jack the prices way up. It's probably about £2.50, I'd guess at Sainsburys. Even if it's £3.00 or £3.50, it's MILES better than this M&S brand stuff so totally worth it.

Let me see some Amazon reviews. Wow. Everybody loves this stuff. One woman said that she ran straight to the toilet after the package arrived. She was that excited about using it that she forced her bowels open just to have a go at the toilet paper. Or maybe it was just a dry run.

But there's always one guy who has to be different. Even something as undeniably awesome as Andrex Shea Butter toilet paper has a detractor. "Kev" contends that the quality of Andrex's toilet paper is going down and suggests that a more fitting name for the product would be "touch of sandpaper".

Now, if Kev is finding this stuff too rough, what on earth is he used to? Frankly, it suggests a serious medical condition and/or a serious psychological condition.