New record, boys and girls: most poop ever.

Wait a minute. As soon as I wrote that, I remembered the time that I took double the recommended dose of extra-strength laxatives.

Okay, new record for non-drug-assisted pooping. Started off just like a huge semi-solid log but then became softer in consistency. Then the second movement was softer still. There was actually a third movement, very rare, in my experience (even two is uncommon) which was diarrhea but not too watery. Sort of a pudding consistency.

Anyway, some of it just blasted out. Then after I look down, I see some slightly bloody diarrhea but also a huge chunk of solid crap on the side of the bowl. I don't even know how it got there trajectory-wise.

When you flush, the water doesn't really concentrate much on that part of the toilet. So no way was this thing going to be removed through simple flushing. I left it there overnight hoping that I'd be wrong.

In the morning, I was startled. "Oh yeah. I forgot about that huge chunk of crap from yesterday". I thought it was a bug or rat or whatever one thinks in these brief moments of panic.

I flushed but nothing doing. So I had to aid the process by urinating on it. Not a pleasant experience but it did knock off the chunk. There's still staining but hopefully, flushing will resolve that matter.

And I still have the blood on the toilet from whenever that happened.

Anyway, I think the cause was that I ate a lot yesterday. I bought four chicken wrap/sandwich meals. The meals come with small fries but I also got four side orders (of fancier, larger fries). So I ate two of those meals yesterday, the two small fries, and the two larger fries.

It's weird to think that stuff gets digested and turned into excrement that quickly. That goes against my knowledge of the human digestion system. I thought it took days. I could very well be wrong, though.