Police cells are usually freezing. You will have one thin, filthy, smelly, blanket. So get arrested in summer.

I've never heard of them giving you the option of lights on or off. There are no options in police cells. The lights are on. Always.

Some police think it's their job to punish you by withholding stuff. Others aren't so bad.

I've never seen a cell with toilet paper. Lest you eat it and choke or hang yourself with it? So, try to crap before you get arrested.

They also take your belt and shoe laces. And watch. Have a quick look at the time when they take it. And when you get it back.

Brave man. I think he was treated comparatively well. Though not for an ill, 79 year old! Amazing that they gave him his phone back.

Lesson: Don't carry your phone to an action or demo.

Do take a book. They often let you take a book into the cell with you. They won't let you take a pen lest you decorate/deface the walls. Have a pencil. They might let you take it in with you. If you're friendly. Not gullible.

The worst thing is the boredom.

And, as he says, have nothing to do with the duty solicitor. He's not on your side. He's certainly not your friend.

And don't believe for one moment that the police are sympathetic or hold the same views as you. This seems to be a new policy from the last few years, thinking they'll catch more flies with honey. Where possible have no interaction with them. Though the downside of that is if.you're blatantly unfriendly they might not let you take your book into the cell with you.

One other thing, don't expect to be fed. So, have sandwiches with you. They might let you keep them in the cell. Probably not.

Have proof of ID and address with you in order to get bail. Don't have credit cards. They'll photocopy everything.

Have a few quid with you to pay for a taxi home as they often let you out in the dead of night.

They think their job is to intimidate and inconvenience you.

All told he's done a good job relating what happened to him. He's got a good head for detail. Impressive.

And never accept a written caution just to get out.

Finally, you are totally dependent on them. Not a pleasant experience. Know your rights and you'll be fine.

It'll certainly be a totally new experience. Might even enjoy it!