There's a drum that's been playing for the past...I don't know...hour? I'm tempted to start busting some heads. There's also been drunken yelling going on outside all day. And there was an Orange March which I thought ended around July time.

Eventually, I figured out what was going on. There's a Rangers versus Celtics "football" game. Why would this cause any of this bullshit?

It's some anti-Irish thing. But how are the teams in any way Irish? Or even Scottish? It seems that the top goal scorer was a chap by the name Moussa Dembelle. Does that look Irish to anyone? It's a black man born in France.

How does a black French man winning a fiercely homoerotic "football" match prove that Ireland is superior to Scotland?

I suppose that you see this in sports generally. Why should I support the Chicago Cubs? I'd be surprised if any of the players are from Chicago. Many of them aren't even American. So what makes it a Chicago team? I doubt the owners even live in Chicago. The actual stadium, is in Chicago, I guess. But what else makes it about Chicago?

Oh great, they give you the roster here:

http://m.cubs.mlb.com/roster/

Guy from Missouri.

North Carolina.

California.

Cuba.

South Carolina.

Tennessee.

South Carolina.

California.

Texas.

Washington.

California.

Here's a guy from Urbana, Illinois. That's in sort of the middle of Illinois. Quite some distance from Chicago. It's a rural college town.

Dominican Republic.

Venezuela.

Ohio.

Arkansas.

Texas.

Venezuela.

Pennslyvania.

Venezuela.

Georgia.

Puerto Rico.

Nevada.

Japan.

New Jersey.

Florida.

Florida.

Here's a guy from a place called Eureka, Illinois. Never heard of it. It's marginally closer to Chicago than Urbana. 5000 population. Real hick stuff.

Florida.

Maryland.

Georgia.

New Jersey.

Cuba.

New Jersey.

That's it. So nobody from Chicago. And for those with limited American geography skills, I can tell you that most of those states are in the South. I suppose that baseball is still semi-popular there. It's fallen out of favour in the rest of the nation.

It's also still big in Central and South America for desperately poor kids trying to get out of poverty. But I don't think that this route will be open much longer because nobody's watching baseball in the US any more.

The billionaire owner is from Nebraska.

Why support this? This issue has baffled me since I was a child. Even then I knew that the players were not from the city. So what makes it a Chicago team? It's nonsense. And look at the super fans at these games. They're always clearly unintelligent. With the clown wigs and taking their shirts off and body paints and whatnot. These people aren't going to the nuclear research centre after the game.