I learned something about myself today. I enjoy defecating but I really hate wiping. Under normal circumstances, the job is done in five wipes or less so not a big deal. Even ten wipes or less isn't rage inducing.

But take today, for example: the day after two days of tacos. You use up half a roll of quality toilet paper and don't feel like you're making any progress.

So what do you? Use an entire roll of toilet paper on one movement? And still perhaps not be any cleaner? So I get into the shower at this point and hose down. In real emergencies, I put soap on a washrag and get in there. Obviously, I don't use this washrag for other purposes and clean it at the earliest opportunity.

In other news, been doing some Tindering virtually in Edinburgh. You can use a fake GPS app to change your location. Matched a couple of young fatties (20-21 years old) and a 22 year old non-fatty. So that's not bad. Unmatched the fatties. The 22 year old mentions that she's a feminist so that's bad news but maybe she can help me with finding a flat. Advice on areas to avoid, for instance.

Because I was looking on Zoopla and there's just cheap, decent-looking places all over the city. I mean, take a look at this place:

http://www.zoopla.co.uk/to-rent/details/37598346#26EFVBIOlvoCfjuI.97

£655/month in a former hotel right across the street from the ocean. Looks a bit smaller than most places there but still, the location looks nice.

Maybe this is just what it's like outside of shitty London. Decent, reasonably-priced places are in abundance. I'm all for it if that's the case.