Then today I took without a shadow of a doubt the biggest non-laxative-assisted dump in my life.
It didn't feel like a lot. It came out smoothly, no hassle there, but then I looked down and it was just coiling. It was out of the water and I was dropping more on to it.
I didn't even recognise this as human. It was as though a horse came into my home and dropped a load in my toilet as part of some equine practical joke.
Is it from the granola cereal? Maybe. But I haven't eaten any of this stuff in the past three days. I plan on starting up again today or tomorrow, though. I just didn't have any milk for the past few days.
There was so much shit that I thought maybe this is a medical emergency. But I think I've lost weight, I feel great, there's no blood in the stool, so...I think I should stay the course.
Flushed first time. No problem there. Although, there's shit stains all over the toilet now.
It's absolutely crazy. It has to be abnormal because if human beings were regularly dropping loads like that, toilets would be much bigger.
The only new things I've been eating are that granola cereal and Doritos Collisions. Otherwise, same stuff. Sandwiches, hamburgers, chili, pizza.
I also feel like I'm eating a bit more. I don't know. I feel like I'm testing the human limits of defecating.
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