Hey, new Tinder match. This is surprising. I started at 18-18 year olds and as I ran out of people, I'd increase the age by one year. So 18-19 year olds, 18-20, and so on. I'm up to 27 and only have two matches. That means that I swiped through everyone within 50 miles of Glasgow between the ages of 18 and 26 and only got two matches.

One is a fat 20 year old in Edinburgh who didn't reply to my messages.

So who's this new match?

A 26 year old mastadon. Her hobbies include drinking vodka, napping, memes, and being hilarious. Then she has a quote about how she's fat to give thin women a chance at dating because she has so many other great qualities.

This woman isn't slightly overweight. She's enormous.

I have no doubt that she's a nice person. I'm not here to insult anybody. But why is this the best that I can do?

My profile suggests that I'm a wealthy, well-educated, guy who travels the world extensively for work. Are my pictures amazing? No. But they're not horrendous.

I'm a slim guy and I'm over six feet tall. Let's say that I'm a 4 in apperance. Okay. Let's say that a slim man in his late 30s who's over six feet tall is a 4. Why aren't I getting women who are 4's? I'm consistently getting 1's.

Then you look at the non-physical traits. I'm an American. Women love that shit. My profile suggests that I'm a wealthy world-traveler. Women love that shit. My profile also suggests that I went to an elite university in the US. Negligible love for that but a slight bonus.

How much does this raise my score? Let's say only 1 point. Let's say that appearance is 90% of the score. Still, that would make me a 5. Why am I only getting 1's?

Yes, age is a factor. So let's say that this brings me down to a 3. It still doesn't explain why I only get 1's.

And you know what's really crazy? This obese woman probably wouldn't even reply to my message.

My ladyfriend, who I met from work, is probably about my level of attractiveness.

I can think of three women who I met off the internet who were above my level of attractiveness. I'm talking strictly physical appearance, no intangibles.

The remaining 50 or whatever were all 1's.

There's more to life than appearance. I've always mentioned that these painfully unattractive women I met up with had good jobs. But does it always have to be a 1? Throw me a 2.

The problem is that these dating sites are overwhelmingly populated by men. There has to be a better way.

I saw a video of a big fat Australian guy complaining that he can't get a date with a good looking woman. He's talking about how women should look past appearance. He didn't seem to have a job, he was obese, and he seemed poorly-educated.

The internet mocked him. "This fat guy doesn't want to date fat women but he wants hot women to date him." That's a fair statement.

Not applicable to me, though. When I was going out with these Asian women, there were no minimum requirements. If you're Asian and you want to go out, let's go out. I don't care how painfully unattractive you are. I don't care how bad your English is. I don't care how rude you are. I don't care if you defecate in the streets. We can go out.

And then these women didn't want to go out again. That Vietnamese nail salon worker might be the perfect example. What on earth was she expecting? She's not into me, that's one thing. But she couldn't find anyone. And now she's back in Vietnam working as a peasant farmer.

How many Vietnamese men are interested in 29 year old unattractive Vietnamese peasant farmers? The average age for marriage in Vietnam is 22.

Her potential dating pool is miniscule and it only gets smaller as time goes on. She's not going to find anyone. Her own vanity doomed her to a life of loneliness. A painfully unattractive immigrant who works in a nail salon was expecting Brad Pitt.

What should young people do with their lives today? Many things, obviously. But the most daring thing is to create stable communities in which the terrible disease of loneliness can be cured.

-- Kurt Vonnegut