Hey, I recently re-installed Tinder. It's been a good few months. Shortly after installing, I got a "super like" from an attractive 23 year old. I suspect that this is some kind of scam or bot.

Also got a match with Marie, 30, an admin assistant.

She looks rough but I suspect that it's because of her excessive tanning and possibly drug and/or alcohol abuse. I recreate her profile below complete with spelling and punctuation errors:

Hey well I'm 5foot and a size 6 petite not skinny like a rake I'm basically psychically like a tiny waste hour glass Figure, tanned , blonde but like I've been shrunk as am so small but in portion so all good if you like petite blondes. My personality is big I'm very interested in a lot of things I love my dog he is a chihuahua and I love football CFC I also like shopping, cooking and can't stand Lier's or BS so please be honest that's all I ask I've moved n want to meet for dates c whit happens

Dumbasses like this exist but they rarely match with me. My Tinder profile is the best I've ever done. It's the same bad pictures but the written portion is clever. So one would expect it to put off the dimwits. But it seems not.

Ooh, also a match with ShortNSweet, 33. I thought that you had to put your real names on this but apparently not. Reasonably attractive. So what's the problem? You'll quickly see:

Happy, confident and fun mum to two amazing wee boys (age 2&5). Love getting out & about on little adventures. Singing, music and trying to ski! not a big drinker, like comedy clubs, theatre, gigs, meals and a few coctails...not into clubbing/all day hangovers etc

Man, some big ass tits on some of these sluts. And they're in their underpants. I never match with such women, of course.

Oh, here's my old friend Steph, 30, who writes to prisoners in the US, has some vagina deformity that she likes to tell the world about, and is a self-professed "big girl". She also has a mohawk. No job. I matched with her on a previous go around but this time, I'm left swiping.